Most people have two jobs.They have their regular job, which is hard. And then they have their second job, which is even harder. Their second job is the work of pretending they have their sh#t together in their first job.

We are living and working in incredibly challenging times. We are navigating our way through problems we have never faced before in an unfamiliar, changing environment. It’s no wonder that so many people are experiencing overwhelm. And why so many leaders feel perpetually depleted.

To add to the strain, most people are at war with themselves.

The battle plan? To suppress, deny, disown, numb and ignore the parts of themselves that feel unsafe, unsure, unworthy, inadequate, alone and afraid. To pretend we have it all figured out, when (of course) we don’t. Because no-one has. Because none of us have ever done most of this before.

The secret inner battles raging inside of us at work (and at home) deplete us and damage our relationships.

When I coach people who want to feel more empowered in moments of overwhelm, we start by getting to know the parts of them that feel overwhelmed. By simply learning to say to ourselves “part of me feels completely overwhelmed right now” instead of being swept away by the thought “I can’t handle this” is a big step towards self-empowerment.

Contrary to the neat and tidy perspective that we are singular in our psychology, the truth is we all have many parts. By getting to know the parts of ourselves that are prone to overwhelm, we can learn to care for them, to coach them and ultimately to lead them.

Just one or two precise yet gentle coaching conversations can create more inner space and more inner peace.

With the right support, looking inside to better understand our inner experiences at work does not have to remain in the “too hard/scary basket”. Understanding and leading the many parts of ourselves is the foundational leadership skill most leaders don’t yet have. I am on a mission to change this.

If you would like to learn about how I am empowering more leaders to map their inner parts and learn how to lead themselves first, I would love to have a talk.

You can reach me via email –

“There is a map written inside you in a language only you can decipher. A preprogrammed, secondhand discovery will never do. You’re just too majestic for that.” 

Dr. Matt Licata