The keys were inside me all along

Brooke – Hobart, Australia

Decades of endless striving at work, without consideration for self-fulfilment or wellbeing had left me worn out, disillusioned and numb. 

This pattern of striving for gold stars had worked well for me in my earlier years. In high school and university, it was easier to ‘go it alone’. My accomplishments were measurable and felt within my reach – so I felt I was doing OK. I did not realise it at the time – but by attaching my self-worth to being a ‘lone wolf high achiever’ I was setting myself up for heartache.

When I entered the workforce, after graduating I quickly realised that this way of being created two big challenges.  Firstly, because I had attached my worthiness to the next grade, the next award – I felt like I was flailing. During periods without much praise and recognition, I felt really low. Secondly, outside of my ‘cliques’, I struggled forming connections with people I was working with – which made it really hard to get things done.

I felt that my career was stalling and that I wasn’t progressing up the ladder as fast as I wanted to. This was further compounded with my tendency not to want to stick around in any one place for long – because I never really felt like I belonged.

I told myself the story that my work just wasn’t a priority and I just wanted to travel and have fun. But, deep down the truth was that I really I felt really lost – in myself and in my career.

Today I am fortunate to work for an organisation that really supports me. My leader has invested the time and care to really get to know the real me – beneath all the masks and armour.  He sees my real potential – and that has helped me see it too.

Receiving coaching from Cassandra and reading Self-Fidelity has helped to me to understand there is much more than simply ‘existing’ at work, This truly was a revelation.  Cassandra’s support has given me hope and a feeling of excitement about my working life which I’d been missing for many years.  I now believe I can have the connectedness, stability and joy I always wanted. I was surprised to discover the keys to unlocking this life were inside me all along, waiting patiently for me uncover them.  Being kind and non-judgemental (to myself and others) is so much more fulfilling than that old feeling I was chasing for so many years – the feeling of being out in front of the pack.

Cassandra has been my guide on a journey to knowing, celebrating and remaining faithful to my one true self. I now understand that in order to do meaningful work and be able to sustain myself in the long term, connecting with myself and others is not optional – it’s essential.

Are You Being True To Yourself? Use my Reflective Enquiry Tool to find out.

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